Jose Antonio Reyes cannot disguise the hurt when he recalls being left out of Spain's Euro 2004 squad and hopes to expose his omission as a huge mistake in the 2006 World Cup.
The sparkling, dark Andalucian eyes go dim and the amiable 21-year-old Arsenal striker's voice falters.
"I didn't go to the Euro," Reyes said heavily in an interview with Reuters.
"These are things the selector thought at that moment, that he did not need me for that event.
"But that's something someone thinks and no-one's going to change his decision," he added resignedly at Arsenal's Hertfordshire training ground.
Reyes's comments were in marked contrast to his evident pleasure in recalling how he honed his skills as a boy in five-a-side games, joined Sevilla at nine, made his first-division debut at 16 and joined Arsenal at 20.
Inaki Saez thought he could do without a player many regard as potentially better than Real Madrid's Raul, Spain went out in the group stage of the June-July tournament in Portugal and the coach lost his job.
The tournament, notable for the performances of teenagers Cristiano Ronaldo, Wayne Rooney and Johann Vonlanthen, could have also marked the international "arrival" of Reyes who was not long out of his teens. Instead, he had to sit it out.
Now Luis Aragones is at the helm as Spain look to reach the World Cup finals in Germany and try to end years of under-achievement by the national side.
Reyes, who has been capped 10 times since his Spain debut a week after his 20th birthday in a friendly against Portugal in September 2003, is aware of the difficulties.
"Winning a World Cup is very complicated. If it were up to Spain they would always win everything," he said with a grin.
Pondering Spain's failure to lift more than one major trophy, the European title at home in 1964, despite the richest club history in world football, he said: "No-one knows why.
"Spain always go with a great team and there are always good predictions but in the moment of truth things don't go well for us," said Reyes, a European under-19 champion with Spain in 2002.
WORLD CUP
"But we can't just look back, we have to look forward, two years on there's a World Cup and we have to make the most of it," said Reyes.
He does not believe Spain's deep regional divisions are responsible for the national team's past failures.
"That's not the reason. Of course the Catalans, Basques, Andalucians, we each want to huddle together.
"But when you wear the Spanish national team shirt, whether you're Catalan, Basque, Andalucian or whatever, I think they give everything for their country, because it's their country, it's Spain, which is the main thing for us and the people."
Reyes is proud of his Andalucian heritage, as much as he is of venturing abroad almost exactly a year ago -- taking father Francisco, mother Mariana and girlfriend Remedios with him to the northern outskirts of London.
"Everyone says I'm a gypsy. I'm not a gypsy, but it doesn't matter to me either," he said.
"In fact, the name Reyes is gypsy so that's why people link me with gypsies, but I don't mind."
One of the team mates Reyes gets on best with at Arsenal is Thierry Henry. Aragones made a racist remark about the French striker when trying to motivate Reyes late last year, igniting a storm of protest.
"(Henry) didn't say anything to me, didn't give any importance to it," Reyes said. "What happens is that people give it more importance than it has, but that's life."
PREMIER LEAGUE
Life at Arsenal, living in London and playing in the English Premier League is wonderful, as far as Reyes is concerned.
"I've always liked Arsenal, I don't know why," he said.
"When I was small I'd watch the English league and, I'm not going to lie, I'd watch Manchester United as much as Arsenal and I really liked the fans and the fact that the bench was up against the crowd, that was something that always impressed me.
"I imagined playing in the English league and mostly in a big team like Arsenal.
"I didn't have trouble adapting, I knew Arsenal had great players, like we say in Spain 'galacticos'.
"(English and Spanish football) are not so different. I think English football is harder, with more contact and Spanish football for me and many people is more about possession, more about skill."
It is not all roses, though, as Reyes found out when he was on the receiving end of hard tackles by England right back Gary Neville in his first match against Manchester United.
He is not complaining.
"Well, I don't know if it's by misfortune or because I'm good but in Spain I was the player who got kicked the most, I don't know why.
"I was the player that got most opponents carded. In 20 matches, I got, I don't know, some 30 cards shown to opponents.
"That's why I tell you I'm used to kicks and all that. It's football and no-one's going to do me any favours."
